Divinest Sense
by Lyra Matsuoka
Summary: Sailor Pluto has guarded the Gates of Time for centuries. She is the Angel of Fate. But Sailor Cosmos is determined to change her destiny, and Sailor Pluto must examine her own experience to make a choice...


Hi all! So, here I present a short little Sailor Pluto fic. Do enjoy,   
and let me know what you think! Major thanks to the 'Fuku Faerie' at   
'The Cauldron of Rebirth' (http://www.angelfire.com/stars/Cauldron/main.htm)  
  
AN: This is a nice little fan fiction that popped into my head one day. I wasn't sure where the idea was going to take me, so I just sat down and started writing. It turned out differently than I expected, and about different characters, but I've always wanted to write a Sailor Pluto fic.   
  
Disclaimer: If it sounds good followed by 'property of (insert   
corporate company name), odds are I don't own it.   
  
Story title brought to you by Emily Dickinson, whom I love. Hee!  
  
'Much madness is divinest sense   
To a discerning eye.  
Much sense the starkest madness;  
Tis the majority  
In this as all prevail  
Assent and you are sane -  
Demur - you're straight-way dangerous,  
And handled with a chain.'  
~ Emily Dickinson  
  
Divinest Sense  
By Lyra Matsuoka   
  
The Gates are solitary, as they have always been. They stand   
alone, needing no support from the living who pass briefly by them.   
The phases of the moon engraved on their doors mock me slightly, as   
they always have, reminding me of countries, people, that I have known   
and, once in the all too distant past, loved. The carvings begin to   
glow slightly, and that glow intensifies as the doors swing open   
slightly. I see the glow of the Time Line behind them, that constantly   
shifting matrix that controls so many lives.   
  
A slender, cloaked figure passes through the doors, and they   
swing silently shut. I turn toward the person who dares to invade   
the Mists of Time, and to bend the Gates to their will. So very few   
have managed such a feat...and nearly all those who have share a soul.   
At that thought, my memories crowd forward, pressing my mind into a   
web of...what?  
  
**Silver hair, flowing over the carved marble arm of a throne;   
a golden sigil gleaming in the lights; calm features, beauty itself,   
sculpture come to life.   
  
"Can it be changed?"**  
  
From the distance of memory I watch her, and I watch myself.   
Nothing can be learned from that, of course. Then again, I am not   
certain I want to experience this scene again. But I open my soul   
to the familiar place and time, and I sense my eyes opening on the   
scene.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
I watched her, this Queen who must fall. She had come too   
close, and known too much, to be allowed to take that next step.   
Destruction is the option left to her, and she knows that it is so.   
But she asked for the sake of asking. She asked because she could   
not let it go unsaid. I do not blame her. And because she has asked,   
I am bound to answer.   
  
"No, my Queen."  
  
Serenity did not change positions, or give any physical   
indication that she had heard me speak. I knew that my answer could   
not have been a surprise under these circumstances.   
  
"She is decided then." Resignation in the tone, with an undercurrent   
of...what? Anger? Fear? Frustration? Pain? She is justified in feeling   
them. I am not her judge, all evidence to the contrary. But it was not   
a question, and so I did not respond. Just beyond my view, the lights   
of a ball were shining. Music, so faint that it thundered in my ears,   
accompanied by the distant sound of laughter; a happy place, a perfect   
time, with people who sparkled under the belt of the Milky Way.  
  
"And after? After this palace is destroyed, after my people are   
defeated; what then, Sailor Pluto? What will become of our future?"  
  
It was nearly time, so close that I heard the words of my monarch   
from a great distance. I felt it in the echoes around me, and in the way   
that my vision had cleared to a crystalline quality. I memorized this   
sight, storing it in my mind. For though few know it now, I will be the   
only living being to remember this age for many centuries.  
  
"What, Sailor Pluto? Do you wish to keep this sight close to your   
heart for all eternity? Why, when you could stop this, do you close your   
eyes and breathe in the scent of my kingdom?"  
  
Her words were slightly bitter, but more than that, she was curious.   
I opened my eyes and met the face of a true leader. I watched the eyes of   
a woman who had come so dangerously close to what could never, for the safety   
of this universe, be allowed to occur. I looked to Queen Serenity and   
smiled slightly. My Garnet Rod stood against her throne, and I stood tall   
and solitary in her presence.   
  
Slowly, Queen Serenity reached out for the Garnet Rod. It rested   
quietly in her hands. The Garnet Orb did not wake for her, not that   
anyone would have expected it to. With a mocking shake of her head and   
an angry twist of her mouth, Queen Serenity extended her power. The   
Garnet Rod floated easily from her hand, and moved quickly over the   
floor. I watched it hover before me, and turned my eyes to my Queen.   
My face was blank, my eyes calm.   
  
"Whom do you serve, Sailor Pluto? Do you serve me, or do you   
serve Destiny herself?"  
  
I reached out a hand and clasped the Garnet Rod, turning it over   
in my hands. I watch the light reflecting on my Talisman and finally   
lifted the scepter above my head. I spun it around quickly, faster and   
faster until I knew she was watching me. Finally, I stopped the twirling   
and brought the Garnet Rod alongside my body in one smooth movement. It   
met the floor with an audible click.  
  
"I serve the one who placed this Talisman in my hands for the   
first time."  
  
Queen Serenity blinked at me, and then tilted her head back and   
laughed. She laughed hopelessly, for she knew as well as I that I had   
not truly answered her. It was Queen Serenity who united me with the   
Garnet Orb for the first time, but she knows better than anyone that   
Destiny herself was behind it.   
  
Queen Serenity's laughter mingled with the bright lights and   
merry sounds of the palace. I alone saw that laugh develop into a sob.   
I alone saw the defeat in her eyes as the shadows gathered in the   
corners of the room. And as the battle commenced, I watched as Queen   
Serenity rose from her throne and walked toward the carnage, aware of   
what she would find. As she rounded the corner, I stayed in the throne   
room, listening for the deafening silence that I knew would signal the   
end.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
My memories abandon me as my guest steps forward. The mist recognizes   
her, and will not expel her from its midst. A gray hood masks her features,   
and she turns her head to face the Gates once more. I know what she has   
come for. But she does not speak and neither do I.  
  
She moves toward me, and I move around her. When I stop, my back is  
to the Gates, and she is facing me. Now I stand between her and whatever it  
is that she has come for. Once again, my memories push to the front of my   
mind, pushing against my conscious mind until I sink into them.   
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Golden hair, a simple white dress; another golden sigil, the figure   
that I am coming to recognize as the herald of the question I dread, the   
question to which there is only one answer.  
  
"Can it be changed?"  
  
A crown glitters upon her brow, long golden hair brushes a crystal   
floor as she turns to me.   
  
"No, my Queen."  
  
Another utopian beginning, another broken heart, another woman who   
must stand back and watch as her world is transformed.   
  
Blue eyes, as blue as the skies above, eyes the color of a summer   
sky; a sky that can be warm and welcoming to one person, then cold and   
condemning to another. They turned to me, and in them is the same   
accusation that so many have leveled on me before. What this woman   
before me cannot understand is that I am a messenger. I am the   
Senshi of Time, and people stand in awe of my power, but I cannot   
change this. And after so many battles, so many chances at   
redemption when I stood apart, I am not sure that I could alter   
this course if I chose to.  
  
Neo-Queen Serenity tilts her head back and up, gazing at   
the ceiling. A projection of deep space is reflected there, and   
Nemesis hangs in stark relief against the multicolored pinpoints   
of the stars.   
  
The Neo-Queen sighs, and in that moment I see the golden warrior   
who waits in the past, unaware that evil continues to brew in her   
future. I see a fellow senshi in this queen. But Sailor Moon is   
beyond my reach.  
  
"It has been said that you are an angel, Sailor Pluto. But   
an angel of what, I wonder?"  
  
Serenity speaks to the night on the ceiling, her eyes   
still locked on that alien star, that planet which has the   
potential for such great destruction.  
  
"An angel?" I questioned, looking up at Nemesis. "There are   
worse things to be, I suppose."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The gray cloaked figure steps forward, and pulls the hood back.   
White hair, hair that seems to contain all the colors of the rainbow   
at once, is contained in heart shaped odangos. Her hair reminds me of   
the light of a star. An apt description, if the truth be told. A white   
cape flows behind her, and two pendants glitter on her fuku. My eyes   
fall the movement of the small banner attached to the second, and   
lower, clasp. On this banner flutter ten stripes of color, representing   
the ten senshi who guard and protect this system. And on the far left,   
a white stripe and a black stripe; my color forever protecting hers.   
  
I relax my defensive position. This woman, out of all in the   
universe, I will not harm. I may deny her, as I have so often in   
the past, but I will not harm her.   
  
"And so you have come," I say, standing calmly, Garnet Rod in   
one hand.   
  
"I have."  
  
"The question is, why? There is nothing for you here."  
  
The solider turns her head to gaze at the Gates once more, and   
her lovely face remains blank. "I have come to change things, Sailor   
Pluto."  
  
I nod. She is no longer accepting of her Fate, and so has come  
to change it. She is not the first.   
  
"You know that I cannot allow that."  
  
"You cannot prevent it."   
  
"So you seem to believe."  
  
There is a silence. The gauntlet has been thrown down and accepted.   
  
"Something must change, Sailor Pluto. We cannot continue like this."  
  
"You mean, *you* *will* not continue like this."  
  
She pauses, and her blue eyes cloud with grief.   
  
"And if I told you that there was no one left but me?"  
  
The cold is growing inside me, the cold that I have always   
allowed to take my body when times such as this approach. What she   
says is known to me. Destruction is a force that I have come to accept.   
  
"Are you the last?"  
  
"I am."  
  
"And the others?"  
  
"Died protecting our future. Died protecting me." The last is   
a whisper, a barely uttered phrase.   
  
"You ran from this battle?"  
  
"And if I did?"  
  
"Then I would call you weak."  
  
"And I would agree."  
  
I fasten my eyes on Sailor Cosmos, and I see in her eyes her   
truth. The loss of her loved ones, the battle which rages between the   
forces of good and evil in her so distant future. I see pain, and an   
abiding grief. I see Chaos, the greatest enemy of them all. More than   
that, I see defeat.   
  
And in that moment, I hate her for her flaws. And, for the first   
time in centuries, I allow my eyes to speak for me.  
  
I place in them my memories of a silver queen, surrounded by the   
destruction of all that she had ever loved; exchanging her life for the   
chance that her loved ones would live on in another time and place.   
  
I show Cosmos another leader, a golden sovereign imprisoned in a   
crystal coffin. I show her a princess traveling the roads of time to save   
her parents. I share the view of eight sailor senshi standing tall,   
combining their powers to aid the world that would never know of their   
sacrifice. And finally I show her a warrior, a solider of love and justice,   
whose heart could heal the world.   
  
And finally, I show Sailor Cosmos what I have shown no other. I   
show her who I truly am. I show her the knowledge that I am not afraid   
of solitude, or death. That I have fought to protect these gates, and  
the terrible power they contain, for ages.   
  
I show her that I have nothing left to lose.  
  
"You believe my loss to be a small and simple thing."  
  
"I have lost thousands to your hundreds. I seen dozens of precious   
civilizations fall to your few. I have seen, heard, and known more than   
you can imagine."  
  
"Then you are the weak one, and not I."  
  
Her words hit me in the center of my body.   
  
"I fought to save my people, my country. My beloved ones fell, but I   
fought on. I fought until there was nothing left to fight for. And you   
accuse me of weakness? You, who have watched from afar, a slave to Destiny,   
call me a coward?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You could have saved them all."  
  
"So you seem to think."  
  
"All it would have taken was a single word."  
  
"But which word would spare, and which would destroy?"  
  
"You have no right to play GOD!"  
  
The last word echoes around me, vibrating against walls that are not   
there. I shake my head slightly, and straighten.   
  
"It is only when I have played God," I respond icily, "that the   
course Destiny has set has gone violently awry."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The battle between Pharaoh 90 and Mistress Nine raged beneath us. Out   
of the corner of my eye, I see Sailors Uranus and Neptune standing tall,   
ready and willing to die for this cause...but not until they have seen this   
evil laid to rest. From a great distance, I watch the Academy approach.  
  
I know what my options are. I know what must be. Destiny whispers   
in my ear, urging me onward; she knows what I am willing to sacrifice   
for the glittering future that she has promised me. But as I watch my   
friends, the two senshi who guarded the Silver Millennium with me, I   
know that I cannot allow Destiny her way this time. This is the time   
when I must close my mind to her, and alter the course of fate for my   
own purposes. This time, I will make the decision.   
  
I feel the impact as the helicopter is hit. I hear the yells   
of surprise from Uranus and Neptune, hear the defeat in their voices.   
But they are not willing to give up. They will sacrifice their lives   
for this cause. And this mission, this duty, is foremost in their souls.  
And it is the knowledge of their strength that gives me the power to  
finish what I have all ready begun.   
  
"Dark Dome...CLOSE!" I yell. With an abruptness that shudders   
through my body, Time halts for me, as I knew it would. I am in now  
in control of the lives of all the people in the world.   
I hold the balance of justice. And the power threatens to crush me.   
  
The explosion is stilled; frozen at the precise moment when I   
unleashed my power. Red fire is frozen behind me, smoke a silent   
backdrop to the sharp pieces of metal that hang in the air, poised to  
be thrown outward by the force of the explosion I have halted.   
The Time Line trembles, bucking at my control. I cannot hold it for   
long, and so I send Uranus and Neptune out of the frozen explosion   
to finish what they have come to accomplish. And once they have gone,   
and their lives are their own, I release the Time Line.   
  
As I had known it would, the power snaps back at me, punishing   
me for daring to command it. It throws me into a whirling matrix of   
color, and I drift, aware that I am being warned against attempting   
such ever again. But I was willing, willing to play my part in this   
mission, and willing make my own sacrifices.   
  
I could do no less.   
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
I stand, my eyes cold and distant, but Sailor Cosmos does not   
flinch. She stands tall, ready to fight me for passage to her distant   
past.   
  
I have fought, but not in any way this woman would understand.  
Her world and mine run parallel to each other. She fights the Evil that  
threatens her loved ones and her galaxy. She fights those things that   
thrive on destruction. I fight those people who would disrupt the flow of time, no matter if their intentions be for good or evil. I am one of a triumvirate that contains Destruction. I am the solitary senshi of time, and I walk alone.  
  
My minds eye flashes back to that distant time when I rebelled against  
the course of Fate. I remember the floating sensation, and the knowledge that I was now apart from my duties, that I had fought for what I believed to be  
right. For centuries I had watched, assuring that Creation and Destruction completed their tasks, and that the past was not violently disrupted. I guarded the Gates of Time, allowing only those whose mission was to heal admittance. And as I floated, apart now from the one mission I sought to assist with, I saw far across my own experience. I knew, in that moment, that there were times when I could not guard the world. There were times when I could not save people from themselves. There would be times when I would have to choose between protecting the world, or letting the world protect itself.   
  
And I realized with a shock that this was not the first time I had  
fought Destiny. I had opened the Gates for Sailor Moon, shown her the glittering  
future she was ordained to fight for. I parted the Mists to protect a young   
princess. And now I had saved the lives of two sailor senshi who would defend  
my Queen with their last breath.   
  
As these thoughts came back to me, I glanced into my Garnet Rod, waiting  
for a course of action to be dictated to me. I waited for my choices to be   
removed once more, waited for the voice of Fate to work through me.   
  
But the Orb, for the first time, was silent.   
  
I did not smile, for this was a terrible choice I was being asked to make.  
But it was, finally, my choice alone. I looked again to Sailor Cosmos, and met   
her gaze. And with a slight nod, I stepped aside and opened the Gates.   
  
Cosmos did not wait for me to change my mind. She walked quickly toward   
the brightly twisting rainbow that would take her to a past she was determined to see, and put her on a collision course with mistakes she was convinced she had made. She turned slightly before she crossed the threshold, but our eyes did not meet. She vanished, and the Gates swung silently shut behind her.  
  
I stood for a moment, contemplating my actions. Destiny did not control me  
Now. Perhaps she never had. But whatever the case had been in my past, I had abandoned the reins of control. I was no angel. I was the Senshi of Time. And   
Now I could fight with those I loved to protect the future I knew waited for us all.   
  
From this point on, our lives were our own.   
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
So, what did you all think? Liked it, hated it? Let me know! Please review. Please!  
  
lyrasoze@hotmail.com 


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